Global Warming Fast - Sept 4

This was a letter I got from the Democratic Courage organization on my campus. I'll be fasting with them on Sept 4, and I think I'll personally extend it a day or two (I committed to a 2 day fast).

Here it is, if anyone wants to join me and sign up:
<<<
Dear Christina,

Will you join me in a fast to stop global warming this September 4th?

Click on the link below to sign up, or paste it into your web browser.

http://www.climateemergency.org/joomla/index.php?option=com_attend_events&task=view&id=3&Itemid=194

I'm increasingly convinced that polite letter writing and lobbying alone won't cut it when it comes to tackling the global climate crisis. My own experience, as well as several recent studies, shows that politicians only take the kind of dramatic action to address this crisis when there are people putting themselves on the line for change. It's been true from the Boston Tea Party to Mahatma Gandhi and Martin Luther King, Jr. Now it's time for us to increase the intensity of our actions as well to meet the great crisis of OUR time.

So join me and sign up now:

http://www.climateemergency.org/joomla/index.php?option=com_attend_events&task=view&id=3&Itemid=194

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Defining Orriana-ism

So a church emailed me today to try to recruit me to their numbers... It's a church label that I used to sometimes attend in Ann Arbor, and it was good for a church... but still church. They'd focus on service to the community and talk about christian ethics in terms of simplicity and global warming rather than regurgitated and bland self-help book stuff or doctrine thats bland at best and wrong at worst.

It did get bland sometimes... it was still church.

I like spiritual communities, and occasionally one can find one within a church. I'd meet a few people I can relate to, who react to events that move beyond chance the way I do, and who have similar morals for similar reasons. But most of the time I find people who remind me of the same dangerous and hateful things I was raised with... which did more damage than good to a lot of people around me.

I'm still trying to figure out if there's a better way to find a spiritual community. I definitely feel now, that Christianity isn't necessarily the best place to find those kinds of people. The stance of the American church does not tend to value their environment or value life (other than human). Whereas the Jewish group at EMU hosted charities to benefit the whole community, all the Christian ones just sought converts and held bible studies. Screw that. Where is "I was hungry and you fed me, I was in prison and you visited me" in all that? Where is "live simply, work with your hands" and "don't let your right hand see what the left is doing" when good deeds are done? The values I espouse are about loving all people... especially those rejected and unloved, for no simple reason that they should be loved, and that evil comes from people who had evil done to them. Someone has to break the cycle of that, which means loving your enemies and turning the other cheek. It's about putting yourself last, believing in justice, service and responsibility. It's about forgiveness, and always being willing to sacrifice for others.

But I don't meet too many Christians who believe in this mindset or behavior pattern over say... reading a book and protesting science being taught in classrooms. And it pisses me off. The fact that the American church is highly pro-war... for any war... and this one being a terrible and meaningless war... pisses me off even more.

I've come to a place where I'm ok not labeling myself Christian because of this. I have no problems with Christ's teachings, but I have no need for dogma, ritual or faith as defined by blind leaps into space when some religious leader tells you to do so. That shit kills.... and I've seen it kill. I let it eat me away for years. If one believes in a "loving" God that tortures people for eternity for not saying some religious magic words or performing some other little ritual, what will their own love look like? That is not unconditional love... that is a controlling, inconstant and meaningless affection... a very bipolar god I would not want to spend any time with. There are people who by evangelical definitions are doomed in hell who I would gladly give my life for and switch places, because I know they are good, and I know they are beautiful, even more so than so many people who have said those magic words into space. I'd go to hell for a lot of people if it would do any good. But the answer I got when I prayed into this? That's the point. That's what Jesus was supposed to be about. If there is an eternal hell for anyone, the gates of hell did prevail. If every knee will bow and tongue confess, why will some still get punished? There has to be a journey... there has to be mistakes and lessons and cycles of growth, because that is what being human is all about. A movie where the characters did nothing but sit still and worship in other bliss would be insanely boring, and so would such a heaven.

The love that comes from the followers of such a god will love in much the same way, turning against their relatives when they are gay, smiling forcefully towards any they believe are doomed if isn't for their magical lifeline. That isn't me... and the last vestiges of that belief system will be worked out of my system sooner rather than later.

So what am I? "Spiritual but not religious" is probably the best label... and only if I have to have one. I certainly don't feel I need one. I have experienced things that go beyond chance and I have met others who have had similar experiences. I do believe in something beyond the directly observable, and in some manner, I do believe in God. I just don't think he/she/it's an asshole. But everything I do "believe" is probabalistic. I don't know for sure if there is a God, I don't know for sure if when I die I will get to sit down for coffee with this cosmic presence.... I won't know... until I die. So all I have is a guess, a guess which if I'm very lucky, can be occasionally tested as a hypothesis through prayer, meditation and interacting with the world. And I'm ok with that.

Maybe some day I'll work out the central tenets of Orrianaism... but for now, here's that letter I wrote back to the Ithaca Vineyard:

Hey Rebecca,

I checked out your church website a little while ago and found that I don't think I'd fit in so well. The Vineyard I attended before was very service-oriented and was in no way connected to politics like a lot of other American churches, and was in now way, well... fundamentalist like a lot of other protestant or nondenominational churches. But something on your website gave me cause for concern, and I'm guessing I'm interpreting it correctly, it simply said "We believe that the Bible is the inspired, infallible word of God"

This leads me to believe that the church does not take an open stance to evolution, or perhaps growing research supporting the idea that homosexuality is fixed and therefore should not be treated as a sin... or that similar stands are taken where people choose their interpretation of the bible over things which I believe is probabilistically far more like to be true, and standing against those things perhaps even ethically wrong.

I believe the bible is valuable, but I believe to take words translated from fragmented manuscripts in dead languages that in most cases vary between copy to copy, one will make an idol out a collection of texts that even at best, is fallible just like any human teacher would be.... and that's only assuming Christian denominations could agree on a translation or interpretation. I really don't find the belief that the Nicean council could simultaneously put only the most inspired and true books together out of hundreds while these same leaders were persecuting other religions a necessary or even likely belief. If anything... I think little statement is very divisive, and when taken seriously enough, a dangerous belief that makes one loose site of what we know of Christ's teachings.

I really don't know where I could find a spiritual community out here where people do share my beliefs, or even if I need to find one. It certainly would be nice, but I'm still looking.

thanks anyways,

Christina

No such thing as accidents.

Today's Mantras:

I don't believe in accidents, in that I don't necessarily believe in coincidences on a cosmic level. The only accidents are the ones we make ourselves.

I don't believe in guilt, or regret, unless I hurt someone other than myself.

Mistake is just a more negative way to say lesson.

I don't believe in mistakes, except for the ones we need to make, certainly not when we are aware we need to to make them.

Sometimes the jump is worth the fall, and I really can't live without that feeling.

A Secret

I'm camped out by the river
where only I might know to go
and no one else can find it
'cept the ones I've never told

you can't take back whats given
let it fall back, stay or flow
The river's always been here
so what if water comes and goes?

And I can wait and sit here
for a moment, for a while
But only if you let it out
may air you'd breathe be mine

It's Pretty Here =)

Ithaca is a very emotive and moody woman... but that's why I love her. On the walk up the gorge trail every day there are little change and new surprises, the water rushing over the gorge rises and falls, it's misty or clear, and people leaves stacks of stones all over the place merely to show they were there. Sometime a pile of flower will be in the middle of the water for you to question it's existence, sometimes a painted rock. Sometimes people are meditating in the overhangs by a waterfall, sometimes a (cute) guy is sitting reading a book on a rock in the middle of the river. Once I saw some young lovers sleeping in under the waterfall, holding each other... not caring a bit that the world could see them where they were, mainly because where they were was beautiful.

I love Ithaca.

And the gorge trail is just as beautiful at 4 AM... I'll miss it in the winter time.

An awesome windstorm hit the other day, pulling tiles off rooftops, blowing branches off trees and begging people to feel passionate like she was. Mark said he was jogging past a tree that was completely uprooted. He called me the other day to make me feel better after reading my last blog post after Tali directed him here.
I guess since Mark and Tali are both reading this I should be careful what I say...

So if anyone needed to know about that secret fantasy I've had of sex with Mark and Tali where Mark is wearing a Princess Leia golden bikini and Tali is dressed like R2D2... Feel Free, but I guess It's not safe to talk about it on the ol' blog anymore. You all know what a Star Wars Fan I am... it was bound to pop into my head one of these days.

Wind in the Wheat...

Below is Chapter 21 from the Little Prince: one of the best children books, and best books ever.

It was then that the fox appeared.
"Good morning," said the fox.
"Good morning," the little prince responded politely, although when he turned around he saw nothing.
"I am right here," the voice said, "under the apple tree."

"Who are you?" asked the little prince, and added, "You are very pretty to look at."
"I am a fox," the fox said.
"Come and play with me," proposed the little prince. "I am so unhappy."
"I cannot play with you," the fox said. "I am not tamed."
"Ah! Please excuse me," said the little prince.
But, after some thought, he added:
"What does that mean--'tame'?"
"You do not live here," said the fox. "What is it that you are looking for?"
"I am looking for men," said the little prince. "What does that mean--'tame'?"
"Men," said the fox. "They have guns, and they hunt. It is very disturbing. They also raise chickens. These are their only interests. Are you looking for chickens?"
"No," said the little prince. "I am looking for friends. What does that mean--'tame'?"
"It is an act too often neglected," said the fox. It means to establish ties."
"'To establish ties'?"
"Just that," said the fox. "To me, you are still nothing more than a little boy who is just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you, on your part, have no need of me. To you, I am nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world . . ."
"I am beginning to understand," said the little prince. "There is a flower . . . I think that she has tamed me . . ."
"It is possible," said the fox. "On the Earth one sees all sorts of things."
"Oh, but this is not on the Earth!" said the little prince.
The fox seemed perplexed, and very curious.
"On another planet?"
"Yes."
"Are there hunters on that planet?"
"No."
"Ah, that is interesting! Are there chickens?"
"No."
"Nothing is perfect," sighed the fox.
But he came back to his idea.
"My life is very monotonous," the fox said. "I hunt chickens; men hunt me. All the chickens are just alike, and all the men are just alike. And, in consequence, I am a little bored. But if you tame me, it will be as if the sun came to shine on my life. I shall know the sound of a step that will be different from all the others. Other steps send me hurrying back underneath the ground. Yours will call me, like music, out of my burrow. And then look: you see the grain-fields down yonder? I do not eat bread. Wheat is of no use to me. The wheat fields have nothing to say to me. And that is sad. But you have hair that is the color of gold. Think how wonderful that will be when you have tamed me! The grain, which is also golden, will bring me back the thought of you. And I shall love to listen to the wind in the wheat . . ."
The fox gazed at the little prince, for a long time.
"Please--tame me!" he said.
"I want to, very much," the little prince replied. "But I have not much time. I have friends to discover, and a great many things to understand."
"One only understands the things that one tames," said the fox. "Men have no more time to understand anything. They buy things all ready made at the shops. But there is no shop anywhere where one can buy friendship, and so men have no friends any more. If you want a friend, tame me . . ."
"What must I do, to tame you?" asked the little prince.
"You must be very patient," replied the fox. "First you will sit down at a little distance from me--like that--in the grass. I shall look at you out of the corner of my eye, and you will say nothing. Words are the source of misunderstandings. But you will sit a little closer to me, every day . . ."
The next day the little prince came back.
"It would have been better to come back at the same hour," said the fox. "If, for example, you come at four o'clock in the afternoon, then at three o'clock I shall begin to be happy. I shall feel happier and happier as the hour advances. At four o'clock, I shall already be worrying and jumping about. I shall show you how happy I am! But if you come at just any time, I shall never know at what hour my heart is to be ready to greet you . . . One must observe the proper rites . . ."
"What is a rite?" asked the little prince.
"Those also are actions too often neglected," said the fox. "They are what make one day different from other days, one hour from other hours. There is a rite, for example, among my hunters. Every Thursday they dance with the village girls. So Thursday is a wonderful day for me! I can take a walk as far as the vineyards. But if the hunters danced at just any time, every day would be like every other day, and I should never have any vacation at all."

So the little prince tamed the fox. And when the hour of his departure drew near--
"Ah," said the fox, "I shall cry."
"It is your own fault," said the little prince. "I never wished you any sort of harm; but you wanted me to tame you . . ."
"Yes, that is so," said the fox.
"But now you are going to cry!" said the little prince.
"Yes, that is so," said the fox.
"Then it has done you no good at all!"
"It has done me good," said the fox, "because of the color of the wheat fields." And then he added:
"Go and look again at the roses. You will understand now that yours is unique in all the world. Then come back to say goodbye to me, and I will make you a present of a secret."
The little prince went away, to look again at the roses.
"You are not at all like my rose," he said. "As yet you are nothing. No one has tamed you, and you have tamed no one. You are like my fox when I first knew him. He was only a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But I have made him my friend, and now he is unique in all the world."
And the roses were very much embarassed.
"You are beautiful, but you are empty," he went on. "One could not die for you. To be sure, an ordinary passerby would think that my rose looked just like you--the rose that belongs to me. But in herself alone she is more important than all the hundreds of you other roses: because it is she that I have watered; because it is she that I have put under the glass globe; because it is she that I have sheltered behind the screen; because it is for her that I have killed the caterpillars (except the two or three that we saved to become butterflies); because it is she that I have listened to, when she grumbled, or boasted, or ever sometimes when she said nothing. Because she is my rose.
And he went back to meet the fox.
"Goodbye," he said.
"Goodbye," said the fox. "And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye."
"What is essential is invisible to the eye," the little prince repeated, so that he would be sure to remember.
"It is the time you have wasted for your rose that makes your rose so important."
"It is the time I have wasted for my rose--" said the little prince, so that he would be sure to remember.
"Men have forgotten this truth," said the fox. "But you must not forget it. You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed. You are responsible for your rose . . ."
"I am responsible for my rose," the little prince repeated, so that he would be sure to remember.

Waiting for glue to dry.

This post contained personal stuff, and has moved on to a better place... a farm in the country, if you will.

setting the record straight/ personal mottoes

(The beginning of this post has been moved elsewhere due to personal-ness.)

But here's my mottoes of the day or week to keep my head straight. Some of these are old, half of these are new... but all of them are things I'm currently trying to live by.

1. People do their best even when it's not good enough. Let it be.
2. Never label anyone less than human... or anything more.
3. To call someone a fool is to prove you don't understand.
4. Never forget, and always forgive.
5. There's a difference between being sorry, and being different.
6. Better to strive for no one and be surprised than lower your standards.
7. People make mistakes, They have accidents... But there is no such thing as a coincidence.
8. The meeting of two individuals is like the meeting of two chemical substances. If there is any reaction, both are transformed - Carl Jung

I'm a sucker...

Whatever the male equivalent of a damsel of distress is... that's what I'm a sucker for. I just am.

In other news, I've given up on a password-protected post. I'm just too damn lazy. But being that most of the weird privatish stuff (most, not all) is over and done and easy to digest, I'll start posting again soon.

But for today, I'll continue to be a workaholic.