I did a bit of free-writing about some things awaiting me in Ithaca, much of which is a little too personal for this blog, and these excerpts are borderline. But most of you who understand it I trust it with, so here it is: I could easily forget it all, to pretend you are just like any of the rest, until it really is so. But in those other cases, the good could be more easily sifted from the bad, the gifts were a bit more mutual and eternal and the misunderstandings could eventually be nothing more. But the weight of what you did leave me with is much heavier, and the memories would eat me away from the inside even if I did not rehearse them consciously. In the perfect world, I'd still retain you, I'd still cherish you... and nothing but the physical would have to change. But the physical and broken promises is all you left me with, giving me a a bittersweet aversion and attraction to all similar emotions that can come afterwards for others.... for you were a wonderful ...
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